News and Knowledge

Any family’s trip to Disney World during the holidays is likely to require a lot of preparation. For a family with three children, two of whom have autism, it is extra challenging. This is how the mom in the family prepared: She packed a white pop-up Christmas tree, a spiral cone-like shape that assembled easily, for her daughter so she could line up all of her Disney figurines around the base. For her son, she packed his collection of Dr. Seuss DVDs, so he would be distracted enough to not disturb his sister’s neatly assembled lines of characters.

What they chose to pack and why demonstrates the countless ways families who have members with autism can prepare for the holidays and the innumerable ways in which those preparations can go awry. Having back-up plans will support all members to move through the scenes of the holidays with as much ease and joy as possible.

Whether you are planning to be home or traveling this holiday season, these suggestions can help you make your holidays happily memorable:

1. Keep your child’s comforts close at hand. There will be enough newness in the people, places, and events of the holidays. For youth with autism, their comfort items and activities can act as an anchor throughout the changing variables.

2. Provide information. If your child with autism doesn’t ask questions, you may or may not think to offer information. What is most deceiving about children with autism is not knowing how much they are listening or understanding. Always err on the side of giving more information on what they can expect from holiday events and travels than less, and continue to do so when plans change.

3. Use visual, auditory, and story-telling supports. For neuro-typical children, telling them about the events to come or changes in plans is enough. For children with autism, more varied presentations are often required for them to hold and accept the information. Use visual schedules, timers, and social stories or published books that depict the scenarios you anticipate going through together. Experiences that are previewed are generally much more successful than those that are not.

4. Let go of “should.” Even among neuro-typical adults, there is a tendency to follow an expected code of activities and behavior around the holidays. This is in part what makes the holidays stressful: not doing what we are most comfortable with, but doing what others expect of us. Be mindful that for individuals with autism, this stress may be exacerbated. Prepare for accommodations by thinking, “It’s okay if…”

5. Do not base the present on the past. It has been a whole year since the family has gathered for the holidays. Your son or daughter might be in a very different place developmentally or may still behave and react in much the same ways as last year. In either case, keep an open mind about the events this year and prepare in the ways that make sense for your family’s current situation.

The holidays can be a stressful time for all of us. The changes in routine, seeing people who may not be familiar and visiting places that we rarely go to or that are new create a range of emotions and reactions. Figure out how you can best prepare to help your child with autism deal successfully with the holidays and find joy. Be willing to be surprised and take each scenario as a learning experience.

About the Author

Meghan Mulvenna has been serving individuals with autism for over 20 years, including work in the United States, Southeast Asia, and West Africa. She is focused on demonstrating ways for education to be relevant and to empower individuals to become more independent participants in the world around them. Her present venture, Special Travelers, offers travel accompaniment, community integration, and consultation and training. The mission is to bridge the gap between learning and living. Mulvenna holds a bachelor’s degree in special education and a master’s degree in organizational behavior.